BARD’S QUESTION FOR THE AGING MASSES

WHEN
FEEBLE COMES

A
question for the aging masses:

When
feeble comes,

Who’ll
wipe our arses?

In
this time of smartphone fret

And
fixation on the internet,

If
wiping can’t be done by app.

Or
swiping screen to find a map

Then,
like-as-not, a dirty bum

Will
be our fate in Old Folks Home

Soon,
no one left for menial role, 

To
clean about, to make us whole.

And
those that dream career in Arts

Won’t
want to wipe the bottom parts.

Entitlements
and Presidents

O’er
labour’s taken precedent.

And
workers with the hours once set

And
triple-pay conditions met,

In
hazard suits fluorescent-decked 



To
scare infirm, and poop eject.

Our
demise could be embarrassing –

As
brown-outs to next world bring.

John
Tuach

Pynn’s
Brook

March
21, 2019

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6 COMMENTS

  1. Nearly ten am, and no posted on this. A few good laughs here, and much truth. Our health system in decay, every week a new revelation of stories, and many more that go unnoticed. And ageing population, all wanting big degrees, highest salaries, and least time spent…..and old folks pushed into a corner and neglected…….no one to wipe our arses, bed sores galore, and medication overload. No robots yet to clean a dirty bum. MFs is not the only problem we face.
    Winston

  2. So true.Ifear the same thing.As Winston says we old people will be put away and largely forgotten.By the way I don't see how some of the young people these days can wipe their own arses,being so overweight.We will probably be the ones wiping their arses.

    • Obesity, that is over weight, is one of the leading causes of cancer. For men it is obvious around the belly. fro women belly and hips.
      Much is caused by unhealthy foods, and even the First Nations pople seriously impacted.
      So I expect many of the young people will not grow old. Indeed the USa is now seeing a decline in average life spans, which had decades of increasing. McDonalds, Tim Hortons KFC etc as well as many packaged food, chemicals and preservatives, makes for lots of work for cancer care. We older people had many local grown vegitables, and meat not loaded with antibiotics. Many of us can still do our own wiping, as long as we avoid the Long Term Care Homes. Is Haggie making progress on community home care assistance?
      WA

  3. Funny stuff. A Taiwanese friend of my wife told her she wanted a daughter because a son won't be wiping her arse when she gets old.

    Now that many of us have one or no offspring at all, and with more old people than young + massive provincial debt, we are going to be a very old, filthy and uncomfortable lot.

    I added a GFI receptacle near the toilets for a bidet system and plan on adding stair lifts as needed. Some of these Japanese things wash and dry with separate settings for men and women. I plan to age in place and retain some comfort and dignity if possible. The wild card is dementia.